Below Me

I believe it was Thursday night that I had a weird dream where I couldn’t tell if I was D or myself.

We’re standing in this dimly lit area. The floor is slanted, as if on a hill or incline, and this incline seems to be covered in.. stuff. There are several of us here, most of which I don’t really recognize. I’ve been listening to this one man that is significantly shorter than me. When I picture him, the only image that comes to mind is some sort of chibi husky or grey and white dog.

The man must have said something bad, though. Because the next thing I know, I’m grabbing him by his collar and dragging him up this hill, telling him a bunch of things that ends with “remember your place”. I then turn and throw him down this incline while saying “which is below me”.

Okay.

___

The next night I was all over the place. At first it felt like I was with Karas, possibly. At first I was with a small group of people where there was a lot of snow. We were by something that appeared to be like the white house, with big walls and cameras around it. I walked across a foot bridge that went over a freeway and landed in some sort of forest. That’s where he showed up, and we were walking through some sort of forest location that had a large ravine or river in it. It seemed like we wanted the ravine, because we followed that for a while, but then we moved away from it, along some hilly grass location that reminds me sort of of a beach. We were talking about his parents (kris, ed), and I guess they are missing in this dream.

It cuts and I’m somewhere else. There are a few places going on here. At one point I’m in the air, flying? Or being flown? with a group of people. I look down and see this small hut on the end piece of a large hill. It’s nestled into trees, and you can really only see the smoke coming out of the top of the hut. We left that person at home, because I guess they were a pain to work with? The sun was setting here.

Then i’m on the ground, and we’re at the edge of a spit of land that’s got trees on one side, and water on the other. There is Lorie and Marie and maybe Kami. One of them was asking Lorie whether I was coming with, or why I hadn’t been assigned with them or something. ANd she made a comment that it only makes sense given some sort of information I had been given. I remember looking up and asking them if they were trying to talk to me, because I hadn’t heard them up to that point. But she left without saying anything. I’m not sure what’s happened btwn us.

We’re still worrying about the missing people. I look down and flip over this blanket or something similar, and a small black disc is there. Somehow I feel like this is D telling me it’s going to be okay?

Then I’m standing out along a bay, the sun is barely in the sky anymore. And there are people leaving, flying off into the air. There is one airplane that decides to crash into the water on purpose, though? It was odd….

By the very very end of the dream, I had reconvened with a group of people. We’re driving in this car that is on a freeway. We pull off to where we’re staying, which seems like a fairly high end hotel of some kind. I feel like we’ve returned to the place that had a lot of snow, but now the sun is up and shining, and the snow seems largely gone? The place had a vague sense of familiarity to me somehow.

___

Last night was also busy. I don’t remember most of the details, though.

What I do remember is the end of the dream cycle. I was with my grandmother and some younger female. We were traveling around, either collecting dues from people, or checking in on people. I felt like it was also a case of introducing me to a few people, switching over some contact from her to me, etc.

The place we stayed at the most was some sort of run down mini-mart in the middle of an alley. I felt like somehow this was all tied to whoever HF represents. Almost like he was on the phone with me while I was doing this or something. Or maybe i had a meeting with him before this, and it rang in my head while I went around. Either way, a connection somehow.

Can’t wait for this to finish.

Memories

I looked for him.

I poked in the dark areas. Pushed against the walls of wherever I found myself. I looked and found very little.

From time to time he would find me. There would be heavy emotions and snogging, but as soon as he’d find me, he’d leave again. You can’t stay too long, lest your mind start to act up again. Enough to keep you sane. Nothing more, nothing less.

But I don’t like being used as a means to stay sane. All or nothing. That’s always been the motto.

So I set out to find him. Not content to sit in a black room with no definition. I needed to find where he was holing himself up, to try and fix things before they became unfixable.

__

There are images that follow us here. Phrases and words. Emotions and feelings.

“I wish I was dead” Images of being forcefully drowned. Thrown down a well. Smothered in blackness.

You can’t drown me, I tell him. He knows it, but can’t stop trying to do so on impulse. The mind reels and creates fabrications to placate itself. I get stuck in the middle.

I take the jet to bed in hopes that I will be able to find him at some point. As I lay and stare at the ceiling, I find myself walking down a hallway that leads to a door. I bang on it, telling him to let me in. He refuses. I attempt to open the door with a key, but he’s changed the locks. I reset them and come in anyways.

It’s small and round. Closed in an tight and filled with items I can’t discern. There is a cluttered feeling to the space. It’s warm and still. I sit on a chair in front of the door. That way I’m not in his face, but he can’t skirt around me and leave, either. He hovers in the darkness on the opposite wall. I tell him he can’t hide from me, I can see him even without being able to see.

I do like old times and light up a cigarette. Sometimes I miss those times where we sat around and just smoked. It was simpler then. We had clear roles and they were easy to navigate. Everything is a mess now.

He comes closer to me, I forget why. I reach my hand up and touch his torso. My fingertips light up as they lightly push into his body. He reels back and I see the lights in his torso. Harder for him to hide now. The room echos with “why”. Why am I here. Why am I still trying to make this work. Why. For a brief moment, I understand how annoying my constant questioning must get.

I stand up, because I want to try and get closer to him. He comes forward and touches me, and I black out.

___

Yesterday evening I decide that I’m going to try again. I look for the room where I was at the previous night and find the spot barren. That option is closed to me. When I grab the jet, I find that I’m thrown into what I can only assume are memories.

I’m laying on the ground. My chest has a big hole in it with some sort of lighter white bits sticking out. At first they look like bone, but the more I inspect the vision, the more it looks like panes of glass that have shot up from the impact to my chest.

A man stands over me. His hand is coated in black blood. He is surprised that I am still alive. He reaches down into the hole in my chest and touches the pitch and runs his fingers down my cheek. I tell him that I have no heart to be removed. You can’t kill me because I’m heartless.

The oddness of the man is that it looks like D.

I push against this memory and try to break out of it. When I finally can, I find that I’m running through a place that is like a star field, but not. It’s dark and light at the same time, and there are various “things” laying around, floating around as I run forward. I’m chasing after a shadow, telling him to stop running, to quit avoiding me. As I run forward I crash through memories and other things.

Most of them are sad. There is one where I swear D is in the same room that I was fed the poison in, where I killed my son. Watching through a thick layer of something, where he is beyond reach. His teeth feel broken. There is what I can only assume to be blood running down his face. Someone asks him where something is at. He keeps repeating that he doesn’t know. He keeps begging to spare “them”.

Another where he and I are in a room together and he is suddenly not himself. I am slammed against a wall. And I am reminded of E when he was poisoned, and how he lost himself in the mire.

Perhaps someone controlled him the first time, and attempted to kill me. There are memories of him holding me, crying for what has happened.

I keep running forward.

The closer I get, the more the place fights me. A black curtain drapes over me, and I’m thrown into the dark. I create a golden circular symbol on the ground before cutting back out to the memory plane. I run some more before being thrown into a room where the door is locked. The space is a proper star field. I pull a star down and start to vibrate it. I work to vibrate all of them, and I can tell (in time) that he can feel it.

I black out.

___

When I wake up, I find that my clothes have shifted. My whites have become a dark maroon. The fabric thicker, richer. Beads of a red wood are wrapped around my left forearm. The room is now breathing where it wasn’t before.

I’ve noticed that he shifts my clothing to maroon. Or at least, after a point he began to. Somewhere around when he put the golden dots and lines on my pendant, but before they started to appear on his skin. Somewhere around when he opened up the deeper bond lines, the shirt started to turn maroon.

He’s infected.

A1 tells me to stay in the room while we have fun out here. Our hope is that the energy will soften D up and that he’ll talk to us. While we’re going at it, I feel like he is leaning over me, his hands wrapped around my upper body, but as soon as we’re done he’s gone.

I get up and break out of the room and back into the memory field. I grab the shadow, and the action of doing so causes me to fall backwards. When I look up, I see that there is a darkened form of himself standing over me. It doesn’t move or react or speak. I grab up the shadow and enter into this form, and it feels a lot like moving through water. We walk forward into the darkness, and the shadow forms into what I can only describe as a small child or small form of himself.

I find a chair or throne or something in this space. We sit down in it and I pass out.

___

At night I dream about wandering around with a group of people. We go a number of places, but seem to be staying at what I can only equate to a bed and breakfast, or a very cozy mom and pop hotel type place. The rooms are upstairs, and you can do downstairs into a shared dining space. I spend a fair amount of time down there. I hear the news overhead from a TV where apparently someone in a neighboring country has had their son, the crown prince, die.

I leave for short bursts and then come back. The only excursion I really remember is going through these rooms, looking for keys. I had a few keys in my hand, and saw three racks of them on a door. These keys don’t look like keys- they honestly look like Christmas ornaments. I grab all three racks and hurry to close the door before the people following us get to us. Not sure what the keys are for, but they seemed important.

___

When I come to in the morning, I find that I am still on the chair, but the portion of D has gotten larger. It seems like he’s sleeping, but it’s restless. We’ll see what this afternoon brings.

Tomorrow

I’m standing in a mall like structure with someone else. We’re walking around and there are a fair amount of people around. Twice I come to this waterfall that is inside of the mall. I can’t tell if it’s a man made waterfall, or something the building was built around. It looks very intricate and realistic if it is a fabrication.

I keep looking down at the bottom of the fall, as if I want to manifest myself down there, or convert myself into smoke and waft down to the bottom instead of taking stairs or something else. No matter how much I try to will myself to do this, I seem to fail.

The first time I was here, I am pretty sure I tried to climb down the front of the fall, and ended up getting hit by something, or barely missed getting hit. The second time I was standing at the top, and looked up and saw an arrow flying at me. I reached up and grabbed it mid-air, and by the time I brought my hand down, the shaft that I had grabbed had turned into the long, narrow bill of some smaller bird. My hand hurt from having done this, and the bird was trying to pry its mouth open. I set it down next to what reminded me of a slate blue shoebill.

I and the person I’m with start to walk away from this place. We come up on a large store, and I am seemingly amazed at how large it is. We climb up a set of stairs, and it’s really busy here. I have to duck down because the roof is very short in this area, which seems strange. We round the corner and the roof goes up again, and there are a bunch of small eateries here.

I wake up before I get further.

___

Last night I find myself working with a bunch of guys that I don’t recognize. I can’t tell if my symbolism is being stripped out of my dream vision, or if my brain simply couldn’t find the right symbols or what.

But anyways, we’re outside, and it’s like the sun is either setting or rising. There is moisture in the air, as if it’s rained recently. There are low mountains off in the distance, but it’s fairly flat where we are. Everything is shades of purple and blue due to the time of day.

I’m asking someone about when we’re doing something, and he tells me that it’ll be tomorrow. I respond that I didn’t realize that that was happening, and joke that I need to talk to someone about getting a calendar. Another guy tells me that he’s got a calendar, that they gave him one. And I respond to him that it’s because he’s new.

Like most dreams of this flavor, we’re carrying gear. The overall tone would be setting up for a video production, but likely that’s teh symbolism talking.

There is a cut and I’m sitting in an apt I don’t recognize. I’m on the couch and my leg is propped up on a table. The door knob turns as someone unlocks the door. I freak out briefly, wondering how this guy managed to unlock my door. He steps in and tells me he forgot to get something, and goes and grabs two candles. Which strikes me as weird. He steps out about as quickly as he came in. He reminds me of Richard, the fridge-like structure and beard and such. Hair is definitely a deeper red tinge.

Later, another guy knocks on the door to ask for something. I remember trying to keep the cat from getting out while we are talking, but the irl cat wakes me up and the dream cuts. I’m unable to get back so I can’t tell what happened from there.

Damned cat.

idk

“Your friend can stay, but you can’t” he tells me. He’s sitting at the top of a long staircase that travels down the side of the mountain and runs into the town below.

I’m used to this. I shrug my shoulders and walk off, supposedly leaving my friend with whoever we had met. We’re in a small town that’s nestled in the very back of a long canyon, where two mountains meet together, or perhaps where water has eroded a large portion of a mountain away. I’ve been here before and everything feels vaguely familiar, yet different. As if they’ve done some updating since IW as there last. The roads seem better, more stable and safe. I remember musing about it to someone.

___

I fall into the darkness. There is nothing above me. Nothing below me. Am I within someone? Am I nowhere at all? I don’t know, but I find myself here often.

He shows up and I feel conflicted. Should I be happy that you’re here? Aren’t you supposed to be merged down and gone by now? Am I inadvertently keeping you here? Is he?

“Your devotion is moving. You should learn to be as devoted to him.”

It burns.

___

“I knew for a long time, but never said anything.”

He worried about feelings getting in the way, ruining our work and making things weird. So he stayed quiet and never mentioned what he felt. I would come at scheduled times and we’d work on whatever we were working on, and then I’d leave and go back to my own place. His place was nothing more than a small room. Everything was sorta crammed in and shoved in places wherever he could get it to fit. The whole place was pretty dark and had a sort of brown and yellow overtone.

One night I wasn’t fast enough. Something happened and I fell asleep. He pulled me into bed and laid there with my head on his chest. He tells me that there is something important about this moment. Maybe a full realization of the feelings he had. Maybe something else, I don’t particularly know. But this instance confirmed something for him in regards to myself.

When I wake up the next morning, I freak out a little bit for having fallen asleep on him. Not to mention that I’m not entirely sure what happened to get to that point. I get up to leave and he moves to stop me. He tells me about his feelings. I’m overwhelmed and take my exit.

I come back later and give him a small trinket of some kind. Floating little lights that move in a pattern, I think.

___

I spend all night listening to someone tell me things. Every time I wake up, I forget what I was just listening to. And every time I fall asleep, I fall right back into the conversation.

Later I find myself wandering around some house. G is there, and he is doing work in the basement. Upstairs is a few other people I don’t recall. We’re examining something. Seems like someone here has been hanging fish in the bathroom? It’s a little weird, but it seems important somehow.

Snow

Saturday morning’s dreams were short because the cat kept waking me up. The first real dream that I can remember started off with me looking through someone else, I think. We’re walking through places and the vision is a little weird. Suddenly there is a cut, and everything is very sharp and crisp and I feel very awake.

I’m in a room filled with cubic styled metal. A lot like the control room, honestly. I am looking through someone’s eyes and we are strapped into a very cubic chair made of the same metal that the floor is made of. The furniture in this place seems to be lifted from the floor itself, so nothing separates floor from furniture. The metal is easy to manipulate, and shifts regularly.

Behind me a man says “she is still alive”, and apparently that’s bad. There is an image of these red dots pinging up on a black screen. The implication is that I am manifesting inside of this guy like an illness, in multiple places, and that’s bad. I sorta see myself in darkness somewhere, rolling my head back, delusional a little bit. And I’m laughing my ass off, as if to say “hell no I’m not dead yet”.

The cat wakes me.

___

When I fall back into sleep I constantly see tarot cards from the DA deck. There are more cards in this deck than in my actual deck. And I can’t remember them being in any particular order or pattern. Its like the deck is over laid onto whatever I’m seeing. Most of the locations are dark and I can’t make out the details. Most of the cards I’m seeing are red-tinged, but I can’t make heads or tails out of any of it. Frustrating because I know it’s important, but I can’t do anything with the data as-is.

___

Last night’s dream starts with driving through snow. I’m sitting next to someone in a truck, and we’re driving through a place that has been pounded by snow. Like 6 feet trenches make the road sort of amounts of snow. ANd we spend probably 2 or 3 hours on the road navigating the snow.

You think long roadtrips while awake are boring. Try this.

This culminates in a series of turns that are on a mountain. There is very low clearance, and the road is only somewhat clear. I spend my time looking at the mountain in order to not freak out over the sheer drop combined with the hazards of snow.

Eventually we get out of this. I end up in, probably, a different plane all together looking at some kind of hotel. At least, it registers as a hotel.

Some lady is there to meet me and she walks me through my entire visit. There is a glass bottomed elevator that not only goes up, but horizontally across the building. I try not to panic. We end up in some room that apparently was reserved for us. The place is torn apart, and the lady is aghast at the sight of the room. I don’t even seem phased by it, all I tell her is “I’ll need more beds than this”. The place was fucking destroyed, though. There were large slabs of the dry wall missing. The beds had a rust colored blanket on them, and those were filthy with spots and other things. Everything was knocked over and strewn across the place.

I’m not sure if someone tried to ransack the room for stuff?

Either way, she freaks out and says she’ll get it fixed, even though idgaf. Some small boy later tells me that the ‘bathroom’ is down the hall, instead of the penthouse. I’m going to assume that ‘bathroom’ is tied to what I usually do in a bathroom- and that’s plane jump. I wonder if there is a sort of transportation device there that we need to get. He brings me around the corner and through the double doors inside of the penthouse. This place is massive. There is blue and gold everywhere, and it looks more like an entire wing of the hotel than just a few rooms. We’re walking through this place when we see a golden retriever, and he tells me that someone is there, so we turn and run out of there.

Guess we don’t have permission to be there. Like that’s ever stopped me.

There are short glimpses of our room once it’s been cleaned up. People start to arrive and it seems like we’re either regrouping or giving direction to those arriving. The dream ends before I can glean more.

Arrows at the Ocean

Last night started in a location that seems familiar. I’m fairly certain I went there with Tama in the fall, walking around and looking into shrines that are hidden in the hills and mountains of the region. This time, I’m with Karas and E, and we’re walking around doing… something. This would be the first time I’ve seen Karas in a dream, and sometimes I felt like I was looking at him, and other times I felt like I was remotely looking through his eyes. It was strange.

He is standing on this dirt path by a small hill, and I believe he needed to say a word to get everything to open up. Something to do with a name that E called him, or something E had said or done one of the first times they had met. Whatever was needed causes these blue and teal lines to permeate the side of the hill, and a space opens up. He reaches inside and pulls out some sort of brown cylinder. I classify it as a dusty cheese wheel that is about the size of a hat box.

Dream cuts. Upon waking, I am so enthralled that I saw him in dream state that I make sure to remember it throughout everything else I do that night.

___

The next dream is out at the ocean. There is an outcropping of rocks where I seem to spend most of my time. There are people there trying to go after me. I remember diving or falling into the water at one point, and grabbing the guys arrows as I fell, so that he wouldn’t have ammunition. And I remember trying to swim deeper to dodge the arrows. I don’t remember much about this location, except that the rocks were ruddy despite being by the ocean, and that there was a lot of flying going on and people shooting at me.

Oops.

___

There was another dream where I was at someone’s house. It reminds me of a safe house G and W had thrown me in a few years ago. I’m trying to lay low or avoid someone, but I’m not sure who. Tom ends up walking in and we sit and chat. Someone that looks like BOH, but has eyes like D, is hanging his head around the corner, staring at us. I look up at him and tell him that I can see him there. He ducks away.

___

Wed night’s dreams are hazy to me now. The only part that sticks in my mind is the very end where I am at the beach (again). The rocks are grey and lumpy. There is a bunch of stuff littered on the shore, and we’re picking through it. I’m focusing on these metal boxes that remind me of cigg cases or something similar. But its like these were formatted into purses, where the top is a metal box with a hinge, and it is attached to some kind of bag, etc. where you’d store your stuff.

A lot of them were cool, but none were quite what I was looking for, apparently.

Instruments

Last night was a haze. I felt like my brain was hung up on working resumes and rehashing job stuff as opposed to documenting dreams. THe only dream to make it into record involved me being on a phone with a perceived HF. He was calling me about money, asking how much I had spent or put into such and such account, because he wanted to spend quite a bit, and wanted to know whether I had moved his funds… or something. I remember the number was something along the lines of 33k. Not chump change.

I’m holding the receiver of a land line phone when I see a truck pulling up towards our building through a window. I start to tell the guy, or motion to him, that you can’t drive up here, you can’t be that close. But he doesn’t listen, and the next thing I know, he’s bursting through a door and shooting the place up. I hear HF ask me “what’s that noise” as I chuck the phone and dive for a corner. I’m to the man’s left, and he’s shooting out across from him. I assume he didn’t see me.

It seems like someone either pulls his gun from him through threadwork, or he somehow loses his gun, and it flies away from him. He puts his hands together to make a hand gun and keeps shooting. I see that he has nothing in his hands, but every time the gun shoots, I hear the standard noise for it. Everything sounds correct, except for the detail of the gun missing.

Everyone else is still freaking out as he’s shooting at them. I think to myself “he doesn’t have a gun, what’s the worst he can do” and I lunge at him, tackling him. He gets away from me before I can do anything more.

I think it’s E and I walking around after this, or perhaps E stops by before leaving. I know there was a brief section with a reference to G and Blackwall. I set the gun down on the counter, and it looks like an older tiny machine gun, or some hand gun with a silencer on it. I tell whoever I’m with that I’m going to call the police, and I’m on the phone with someone as we start to walk the perimeter of the house. But when we get back inside, the gun is missing from the counter…

___

Monday night was black, as far as I can tell. Sunday night I dreamed that I was out at my grandma’s place. This was back when the stalls had a shed and all of that. Out of place and out of time.

I go inside and find myself inside of Dottie’s house. Doesn’t look like her house, but that’s who owns it. She leads me back to a bedroom. Something that I perceive as a bedroom, at least. There is a small girl there, she is painting on the wall. Spring colors- green, pink and yellow mostly, into a lower case m. The middle descender is lower than the rest, and I remember that sticking out to me. Despite the paint being very splotchy from fingers, the edges of the m are perfect.

A girl that registers as Kendra shows up and gives me 4 instruments. Part of me feels like Dottie gave them to me, and maybe her daughter fetched them, but I can’t recall. All I know is that Kendra was holding them. There are 4 stringed instruments that all match in finish. The first I call a lute, and is like a violin meets a shamisen. There is a violin that has a face plate of some kind. The face plate seems to make the violin look more like a mandolin. And there is a cello, which has a weird hinged trapezoidal “door” at the top, just below the nut where first position is. It looks like it’s made out of the same material as the finger board. I remember commenting that this was an odd addition, since it goes right where your fingers would be. All of the finishes were a warmer yellowish or beige wood. Not the typical red wood.

I honestly forget what happens after that.

Beaches and Crabs

Wednesday night started out at the beach. We were either on a small island, or were close to some sort of peninsula, as there was ocean on at least three sides of where we were staying. There was a small house that we were using, though I never saw the interior of it. Most of the night was spent wandering around this place, but I’m not sure what exactly the goal was?

There was one part of the beach that had a large outcropping of rocks where some sort of structure was built. I can’t tell if it was some kind of life guard station, or perhaps a restaurant. Down below the beach was covered in smaller rocks and crabs that apparently dig holes for themselves. They’d often lift their claws up to grab at things that moved over the holes above them. It was a little weird.

I was following 3 or 4 people at this point as we walked down the beach towards the point of the peninsula. As you got closer to the point, the beach disappeared and nothing but dark rocks were left. There was one point later when I was going back down to that area and saw grey and white ducks. I believe I had a dog with me that wanted to go after them, but I stopped him.

There was something else I did after this. But I forget what it was now. Leaving a space here in case I Remember it later.

___

Last night was a little weird. I was with a group of people, and we were kind of… all over the place. There was a small town that reminds me of a faded old photo that we were in for a while. Then I was going somewhere else on some kind of high tech plane or other contraption. It reminded me of being scouted out by someone with a lot of money. And that someone asked me to do something for them, and so we were being transported to wherever they wanted us. For whatever reason, my brain registers it as like racing or something.

There is one section where I am traveling through these small tubes or chutes. It’s very industrial high tech looking, and I have no clue wtf was going on. Just that I was rolling through these things, possibly on my way to wherever I needed to do work. I remember towards the end talking with someone that registered as BOH, so possibly E. Too bad I have forgotten most of the specifics.

I am good at forgetting.

The Vase

The past three days have been hectic.

Last night was a jumbled mess. The part I remember the most, I was outside in the darkness with at least one other person, though it seems like I might have also had others with us- a small group of 6 or so.

The area was reminiscent of a large dirt pile. The ground was uneven and there were mounds in different locations. The ground was largely barren and we were running from these large machines that had flood lights on them. I was trying to find a place where we could hole up and hide while they passed, and we were running sporadically trying to get away from them.

Eventually we did.

Somewhere in here, I feel like there was a tree involved. It’s possible that I was trying to salvage it, or its contents, from whatever was going on with this place. The barren dirt and the mounds strike me that perhaps the location is being destroyed or pillaged, and so I was trying to get whatever I could from it before it was gone entirely.

There was another section, a simple flash where I saw this… table top, maybe? It reminds me of a shrine, honestly. Where you’ve got a few stone tables that rest on the ground- the legs are only a few inches high, and the whole composition creates three tiers of varying heights, with the center table being the highest.

On the center table was a set of jars or vases. I would assume the tables contained items tied to whoever was being venerated. And on the center I noticed that there was a short form of the vase that my grandmother just gave me. I can only assume it’s tied to D, but I don’t know how.

___

On Friday night I was with another small group of people in a rocky and cold location. The earliest parts of the night seemed to involve meeting up in some kind of office building, perhaps deciding on a plan and breaking apart into working groups. The next part that I remember is outside at a large outcropping of rock. We’re standing at the bottom of these very grey, almost slate-like stones that went a few hundred feet into the sky. Everyone else wanted to climb up these as-is, but I freaked out at the lack of lines or safe guards if I fell off. Human brain ftw.

I stopped and decided to find another way up. There were scaffolding made of wood that I used, and there were ladders in other areas. And yet part way through, it’s like I decided that I could just fly up instead?? It was very odd. There was an image in my mind that somewhere on the top of these rocks, there was a large crack in the rock face, and it would be too wide to safely jump. I got an image of someone having fallen down this chasm, and being stuck. But I don’t know if someone actually did? Very weird.

Then I’m standing out in a parking lot with a group of people, and I look up in the sky. I see a large creamy yellow owl flying in the sky. It seemed like there was a banner behind him that was orange? Or that something tied to him was orange. I can’t tell if he was a messenger bird or something else.

The last thing I remember, I’m back to that building and I’m talking with people. There was a small child there, but I can’t tell if it was one of my girls or someone elses.

___

Thursday night was one of those dreams that sticks with you.

Early in the night I was in some dark building. It had elements of industrialism or a warehouse, but some areas were nicer and reminded me of an office building after hours. In a lot of ways it was like walking through the staff sections of a very nice high rise.

There was a moment when we had captured someone, and my ‘grandfather’ was telling them that he’d love to rip their face apart (among other things), but couldn’t for reasons. Its odd to hear him speak this way, and it really makes me wonder what this person had done to warrant such anger on G’s part.

There is then a section where I find myself walking around some very populated areas. In a way, this reminds me of a place I was a few weeks ago- the place with the round building that started spinning on me. There were parts that were outside, but a lot of this reminds me of a very high end mall. I end up in some sort of store… its as if I was there to meet up with a specific group of people that I used to work with. It seems like there were 4 or 5 of us, and the idea was that we were in a dance troupe, and we were getting back together for a final performance. So we were here to get prepared for it.

I sit down on some sort of bench and watch everyone doing stuff. The whole store is very bright and modern. There is someone standing in front of me, trying to apply lipstick, I think. Someone sits down next to me, and there is a small child in their arms. The child ends up crawling out of their arms and onto my lap. Part of me was worried that this kid wasn’t mine, and I shouldn’t touch it, but I find myself bending over and hugging them. I can feel their hair press against my face. Upon waking, I’m fairly certain it was one of my girls. The hair certainly fits.

At the same time I began to feel other things, which makes me wonder if I was in two places at once. So many dreams lately involve me doing things several times throughout one night. Whether that’s because I’m on several layers at once, or have to run through something several times, I can’t tell. And I can’t tell with this, either.

My vision goes dark and I feel myself laying in my physical bed, but I also feel whatever is going on wherever else I am. I feel pressure on my body. On my hand, I can feel hair, as though I am touching someone’s neck. I feel lips against my own. And I can hear myself asking “is this what it feels like”.

But then I wake up and everything is gone just like that.